dream come true

I hear it often from pregnant mommies, "I don't care if it's a boy or girl, I just want a healthy baby."  And just again yesterday, there was a prayer request for a "healthy baby".

I understand the desire because it's exactly what I wanted many years ago. I also prayed for the perfect health and safety for my 3 big kids as they grew within the hidden confines of my womb. I read the books, ate everything I should and avoided all I was to avoid. I was careful and cautious, wanting the very best for my growing babies.  As they grew, I thought the "worst thing" would be an ailment or condition that would cause them to be unhealthy and have to suffer.  What heart ache that would cause.  What a challenge that would be.  But then, God changed my life and my heart.

First, He sent my precious Carys. Knowing her genetic make up, we embraced her for everything she was and everything she may or may not become. "Cognitive delays and learning disabilities" were not the perfect picture of health that so many desire in their children, but such was her DNA and they became absolute perfection to us. Come what may, she was our beloved daughter, fearfully and wonderfully made by her perfect Creator. He doesn't make mistakes. We would help her become all that He intended her to be, knowing she was perfectly made just as she was.  No matter how the world might judge her, she was created with a precious and unique purpose.  We, as her mommy and daddy, would help her find it.

A year later came Toben. Though we never got a chance to hold him in our arms, God used his little life in so many ways in our family. We prayed fervently for safety and protection for him as he struggled to survive and grow within his mama's womb. We knew that physical, mental and developmental "health" would likely not be his. Our cry for him was just that he would LIVE!! If he were to survive, we trusted that God would equip us with everything we would need to meet whatever obstacles he might face. He was full of immeasurable worth and value and fully deserved a family committed to meet his every need. Though he did survive, the plans for him changed and he did not come home to our family. However, we were able to love him from afar and see prayers answered in his life. God also used Toben to pave the way for His continued plan for our family.

A few moths later came our little "Elle". Her story was so very similar to our Toben. There were no questions to ask, we knew that we would also embrace her completely, come what may. She had a battle to fight and we would help her to do it. Possible brain damage? Delays? A range of potential disabilities? We'd take it... we'd take anything for the opportunity to love this gift, this little miracle.

The future for our little girls still holds many unknowns. But one absolute "known" is that they will be loved completely, embraced fully and viewed as beautiful, magnificent treasures that God has created them to be. We have come to value every "delay", "disability", and "dysfunction" as a gift, part of the unique purpose God has for each and every human being. Having such especially special little girls has softened our hearts and changed our perspective and expectations. What the world declares they do not want, we have been most immeasurably blessed by. They are two of our greatest treasures here on Earth. 

Lord, I know that you will give me the children that You have purposed just for our family. I ask that you will help me to desire not what the world declares "perfect", but what You, in Your great sovereignty, have declared perfect for our family. I embrace whomever you entrust to our care as a precious gift.  I trust You, Lord, for You have turned a "worst nightmare" into my dream come true.