what if I'd been told

Welcome to the world of foster care!! Are you ready for the ride of your life? This will be exciting, thrilling and full of adventure! You will have opportunities to bring joy, health and life to children who have been hurt - abandoned, abused, neglected, mistreated - and will have the incredible blessing of watching them grow and flourish in your home with your love and care. You will carry the hope that you are helping to improve the lives and futures of these precious ones, as well as teaching your own little dear ones some lessons in loving and serving. In addition, you will have the fulfillment of following God's desire for His people to care for the least of these... the orphans, the fatherless, the weak, poor, broken and defenseless in this world. You will experience His heart for such as these like never before. And while you gaze into the face of one whose circumstance and treatment have grieved God's heart to the core, you will be constantly reminded of where our priorities should be and where our hearts, as believers, need to be. You will never be the same.

BUT...

Be prepared to experience grief and heart break. You will walk into broken homes and lives that will shock and devastate you. You will weep for what these precious ones have been through and then turn around and deliver the one you have been called to love and protect into the arms of one who has harmed them.

Be prepared for unpredictability. The social workers will, with the best of intentions, tell you the plan for the case of each child. But, it will change - many times, in many ways. You will feel agony and frustration as the future of the child you love is in the power of those who do not know, love or care for this child as you do. You will speak out and stand up for justice to be served, but will find that your voice is soft and small and cannot alter the course of the system.

Be prepared for criticism. It seems that many public views are formed based on the horror stories of the foster families that make the newspaper headlines or evening news. There will be several raised eyebrows, strange questions and, the inevitable, "I could never do that - how can you ever give them back?" I'm sure it's well meaning, but it somehow indicates that you must have a heart of stone to be able to love and let go. Oh, but no - not at all!!

You will fall in love and give your heart away. And it is most likely that once you have sacrificed and loved and devoted yourself completely to a little one, they will be removed from your family. You will feel loss as excruciating as death and you will not understand nor will you feel fulfillment. You will be broken and you will doubt if anything you did for the child had eternal value. You will feel very much alone in your grief because, after all, you chose this ministry, right? And shouldn't you expect this would come? Many will not be able to understand the pain you feel.

You will sacrifice. Time with your family, time with friends, time with your spouse, time to have fun or travel - all will be more limited as you love on the ones that have no other family to love on them. You will drive to visits and meetings with the social workers and take special care to maintain relationships between your foster child and his/her family of origin. You will have times of feeling as though it's too much and be tempted to start counting the cost.

You will feel weak and powerless and often exhausted. People might comment that you are so strong, and you will laugh, recounting all your tears and sorrow. You will be humbled and you will hurt. There will be days when you shout out, "I CANNOT DO THIS ANYMORE!" And many will not. Why put yourself through loss and heartache time and time again? Why choose to love when you will be forced to let go?

It will be in this valley that God will remind you.

This is not about you. I have called you to care for the least of these and it will cost you. Please remember, dear child, what I have done for you and what gifts you have been given. Please do not stop using these gifts to do good unto others.

Scripture will remind you.

I John 3:16 "This is how we know what love is: Jesus laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers."

Proverbs 3:27 "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is within your power to do so."

Matthew 25:40 "I tell you the truth, what ever you have done for the least of these, you have done unto me."

Isaiah 1:17 "Seek justice, rescue the oppressed, defend the orphan."

Psalm 82:3-4 "Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy, deliver them from the hand of the wicked."

James 1:27 "Religion that God accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress."

John 13:34-35 "As I have loved you, so you must love one another. All men will know that you are mine if you love one another."

Romans 12:9-13 "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil, cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need."

Music will remind you.







And even the news papers will remind you.

Fatal Care, Deadly mistakes
Child's injuries go unnoticed

We live in a broken world with so much pain, desperately needing the love of Jesus. You will feel a strong desire to do something, to share God's love with someone, even if only one small child at a time. You will remember that you are needed and that your love does make a difference. So, you will swallow hard and say 'yes', time and time again, trusting God to heal your heart each and every time you love and let go.