While enjoying play time at a gymnastics facility with the kids, a comment was overheard by a parent in the waiting area, her words dripping with disdain. "Yeah, some kid told (my son) to 'move over and get out of my way!' It was some black girl out there."
Well, there was only one. And she was mine.
Yes, she can be bossy and demanding. Yes, her words often come across harsh and mean. She can also be sneaky, manipulative and has many attention seeking behaviors. But...
If only you knew that she has just recently been removed from everything familiar to her; that she is separated from siblings and her mom has no interest in seeing her; that for the first time in possibly her whole life she feels secure and loved and safe; that only in the last 3 weeks has she been instructed in the ways we are to speak to and treat others; that she is enamored by the fact there are daddies that care enough to stay with their families; that she's very protective of her little brother because, at 4, she's often played the role of "mom" to him; that she's a tough little girl, because she's had to be.
You have not had the opportunity to see her pride when she remembers to choose kind words or obedience. You have not witnessed her joy when she is praised for meeting such expectations. You have not heard her giggle wholeheartedly and without reservation because she so enjoys being loved, affirmed and teased. You have not seen her excitement at helping to make cookies, or visiting the animals at the zoo, or eating her vegetables - all for the first time in her little life. You have not been her cheerleader as she learns and grows. And though you may not think so, there has been SO much growth! I am so proud of her.
So, please don't judge my girl. There is so, so much you just don't know.
1 comment:
I remember hearing in a BSF lecture years ago that most often we are only missing one detail that would lead us to compassion instead of judgement. So thankful for the compassionate heart you have!
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